Well, the good news is...

I wasn't sick for my birthday this year. That's a first. The bad news you ask? Being sick for Christmas! For the past few days I've had this tickle in the back of my throat. It made my voice sounds kinda funny in the mornings, but I was okay after I showered and got ready. This morning, though-- it never got better. I woke up with my eyes glued shut with goobers, my nose running and my voice completely hoarse. I DID go to work. I totally thought about calling in, but Jason convinced me it was worth a shot to go and try it out. I went, took an hour and a half worth of calls,then asked to go home. My voice and throat got worse and worse the more I forced it to talk. I came home to my wonderful husband, who brought me cafe rio and heated corn bags for me every hour. He was so good. Though I wasn't awake through most of it- I was just so wiped out I slept a lot of the day. Joy, joy.
Isn't it funny that when you feel the worst is when you have the most things to do? Tomorrow we're going out with Jason's family to dinner and to see Princess and the Frog. I was so looking forward to seeing it! I hope we can still go!!
At least I have most of my gifts wrapped and ready. Our first Christmas married! I can hardly believe it! Our tree is up and so cute (and so crowded in our tiny apartment)! We have a few little presents, nothing huge, but it's kinda nice to have a little something.
Our Bandit puppy got spoiled the most, I think! Funny how that works, uh? Our silly puppy has a cute little gray spot in the very middle of his back that's coming in darker and darker every day. Soon enough He'll have another spot! It seems like as he gets older he gets more spots! Now when we get him wet for his tubs he looks more like a Pongo than a Bandit! Ha ha ha!
Well, Merry Christmas everyone! I hope the week goes well for you and yours.

One year older and wiser, too...

Happy Birthday, to you! (My sweet and wonderful Jason, that is!) We had such a fun time! We got to have a party with Jason's family the day before he's actual birthday. We ate cake and shared stories. Jason got a new Cabella's jacket and lots of money! Okay, lots to me, anyway! It was fun to see and talk with everyone. Then I took off the day of his birthday so we could party just the two of us. He got to sleep in (the lucky duck!) but I had a final... or at least, so I thought! When I got there I found out they had moved it to Wednesday morning. So home again, home again lickedy split! I made Jason a bowl of cereal and brought it to him in bed. He laughed and laughed that I couldn't even make breakfast! But who can say no to cereal?? C'mon now, I know what pleases! After that we played some video games and got ready for the day. Nice and relaxed. Then we went to sell back our school books-- happy finals week!! We spent about 500.00 and got a little under 200.00 back. Whatever. It's nice to have a little bit! We went out to Olive Garden for lunch, because they have such WONDERFUL soup, salad and bread sticks! We got to just laugh and talk. Afterwards I even got Jason to do a bit of Christmas shopping with me! But after all that it was time to relax again. We need to have lots of time to relax, I decided!! So we rented a red box movie and chilled at home on the couch for a bit. Once our tummies started growling we got in touch with my parents and decided to go out to Dragon Hill. Yummy yummy Chinese food!! My sister Wendi even came, too. We all had fun trying to figure out how they got a carrot into the shape of a flower! My parents gave Jason a new Star Trek ornament for our tree! (Except... it doesn't really match my theme... maybe he'll have to get his own tree next year!) Since we're such night owls, after dinner we rented another red box and watched that until early morning hours. Such a great day!

It feels like we have so much to celebrate this time of year, Christmas and the joy that comes with it- birthdays and New Years to set new goals for ourselves. So much happiness.

Speaking of happiness... Jason and I have been married five months today. I can't even believe it! Sometimes it feels like we've just always been married. But then others I still wake up next to him and think, "When did I ever get so lucky?" It's fun to think this is the time of year I wanted to get married-- sometime before Christmas in December. Everything seems so much prettier with the lights and snow. And here I am, able to enjoy it with my honey! :) Ahhh....

Thanksgiving... with goals in mind

What a Thanksgiving! Jason and I had such a wonderful day, our first Thanksgiving has husband and wife!! We decided to spend odd numbered years at my family and even numbered years at his- so, 2009 was my family! We went up to Logan to my sisters house and had a great time. The food was wonderful (espesially the ham!) and the company was even better. Everyone watched the National Dog Show before dinner, commenting on how cute all the puppies were. Then there was lots of fun games to play after dinner. My Dad had all of his children play bingo to win corn bags for thier families. Jason and I won 6! They will certainly come in handy since we're trying to not turn on our heat yet! (saving that money!!) We also got to play "Ticket to Ride" and sing along with the Beatles on wii. It was a fun and long day.
It was also nice to just sit and talk to Jason on the hour drive home. We've been talking a lot about how to get him a job. No one seems to be hiring, and even when they are, Jason is "unquailified". But we'll need two paychecks coming in once our lease ends on our apartment, or we're going to be dead in the water. Jason's been taking a serious look at joining the military. We talked a lot about that. It would certainly help us with lots of benefits (including free college and a great paycheck), but at the cost of Jason being away for months at a time. But I think it will be worth it. The question then becomes, how to get him to the weight limit so he can enlist? We've been looking at gyms and diets. It's certainly going to be a challenge, but one that will pay off in the end.
Once we got home I decided I didn't want to just sit there, so I decided to sit at a movie theatre! Jason (graciously) allowed us to go see 'New Moon', since he ditched me the last weekend! His little brother just 'happened' to throw a party on the same night I had tickets. So he went to his party and I took my sister to 'New Moon'. That was fun, but it was still certainly something I wanted to share with my honey. We sat on the very front row, which wasn't too bad. I actually liked it.
I have so much to be grateful for, and this Thanksgiving has thrown that all into perspective. It's always good to count your blessings and rememeber the things we easily take for granted.
Now, bring on Christmas!!

Happy Birthday!

to me, that is!

Yup, Bonni is officially 22 years old now. Amazing how the time flies, considering I feel like I just graduated from high school! Ha!

It was a great birth-week. We celebrated the entire time. On Sunday (the 8th, my actual birthday) I got tons of birthday wishes on facebook and a "happy birthday" every half hour from my husband. Jason and I went to church in the morning. It was a wonderful gift to have a new ward, since this is the first time Jason and I have stayed for the entire block since we moved in! Everyone was really nice. I got to introduce myself in Relief Society and we even said hi to the bishop. After church it was time for a quick nap. Then over to my sisters for an early Thanksgiving dinner. That was so much fun. It made me truly realize how lucky I am to have the greatest family ever. Everyone came, there was some great food, some good jokes and some silly pictures.

On Wednesday I had a paid holiday for Veterans Day. My sisters and I all went out to Texas Roadhouse for dinner! It was so much fun to be with all the girls! I got some new Mary Kay stuff, the Richard Paul Evans book for this year, and New Moon tickets!! They know me so well. I love my sisters. :)

Then Saturday I took some time off to spend with Jason's side of the family. They took us out for a play at Hale called 'Curtains'. It was a fun mystery and it had a lot of really good jokes for anyone that's been in theater. So funny! We enjoyed a yummy dinner at Sweet Tomatoes. It was fun to visit with everyone. Then afterward Jason and I hit the town until 8pm when we went to a concert. (Jason's birthday gift) We saw the Utah Symphony perform in "Bravo Broadway". They brought in singers from Broadway to sing the parts and the symphony was of course, amazing! It was a wonderful date night out with my honey!

So a nice long week. I've been feeling better about everything going on. Sometimes we just have to live through those rough spots! School is getting better- I'm working my tail off to make sure I pass. I've decided that's all I need to ask of my education- to pass. Trying to finish up the semester on a strong note. Everything is going well. :)

I've been considering buying myself a camera for a birthday/Christmas gift to myself. Jason and I have put up our tree and I've had so many fun things happen the last few weeks-- I want to take pictures! Bandit is so cute in his little winter sweater... all those kinds of things. If only I could find one I wanted...

Difficulties

*sigh*... Where to begin?

Everything is seeming so stressful and overwhelming. But I can't pin point why. I'm just barely getting back my willingness to do school. (Thank you everyone that commented, btw. All the support certainly helps!) It still isn't easy to do, though. I haven't been as excited about work as I once was, though I was just awarded "Employee of the Month" yesterday. Even my family life is a bit, depressed. Nothing with Jason, if anything he has been my saving grace the last few days. But my birthday is coming up this weekend and trying to plan anything with my family has been stressful.

I've been kinda wanting to make the beaded watch bands that I've seen around. I've made them before at a work shop where the lady had everything and we just paid her for whatever we used. It was way fun, but to make three bands I spent over 80.00. It was a bit pricey. So for my birthday my sister wanted us to buy our own stuff and make them. So this week I went shopping. I took Amanda (Jason's little sister) with me. She likes crafty things and she wants to learn how to make the watch bands, too. I've been trying to build a relationship with her since I married Jason. She only has brothers in her family and she kinda needs a "girl outlet". I remember when I was younger what a relief my sisters were to me. I want to be that for Amanda. So we went out. She didn't have any money, of course, I never had any when I was in high school, either. I told her I would pay. Beads can't really be that much, right? Not. By the time I bought everything we needed, the beads she picked and the beads I picked, it was over 100.00. Holy crap. I had the money, so I went ahead and bought them. Then I went home and cried. Jason and I hardly ever get extra money and I know how stressed he can be about what I spend. I was lucky to have an extra paycheck in October to have a bit left over, but this certainly wasn't what I wanted to spend it all on. Jason actually shocked me by being completely fine with it. He said, "I just want you happy, Bonni." But the whole thing has still put me on edge. Now I'm not even so sure it's worth it to have them. I took back some of the beads I picked out today. I don't dare take back any of Amanda's things. I did tell her I would pay for them. I just didn't expect it to be so much.

So there's that. But it's everything else, too. Not just one situation. Everything is just piling on, piling on, and piling on. I feel buried alive.

Jason and I talked a bit today about it. Jason repeated his famous line, "I just want you happy." But followed it with, "what WOULD make you happy, Bonni? What is it that's wrong?". And that right there is just the point. Nothings wrong. I'm happily married, Jason has been more than wonderful to me. I have everything I need and a little extra. I'm going to school, working... I should be fine. I'm not feeling very pretty at the moment- I actually GAINED weight for my first week on weight watchers which totally shot my motivation there, and I've been wanting to get my hair done for a while. I've been feeling a bit frumpy. But that shouldn't been effecting me like this, should it?

I don't know. I want Cafe Rio. Comfort food. Seems like it's the only thing that helps. Even at that it helps for... a day? Maybe? And the clouds come rolling back.

What's wrong with me?!

I'm in my thinking spot.

think, think, think...

So much to think about with this crazy life I run. Jason and I have both been having some trouble staying modivated with school. I've been thinking about what the point of it all is, and to be honest I'm not so sure. Yeah, yeah, school is good and grand and pointless unless you're going to USE the degree you earn. I've been thinking about it- By the time I finish a degree in four to five years, Jason and I are going to want to start a family if we haven't already. So I won't be able to jump into the workforce. Since Jason and I were both latch-key children, we've decided that our children WON'T be that way. I would stay home if we had a baby. For quite a while, needless to say. So after all that time my knowledge in the field will be outdated, and there won't really be a place for me, if I decide to go back to work. So point of school being?... That I could support us in the case that Jason can't? True. But am I not doing that already, without the hassel of more schooling? I could be making more, sure. But this is only a worse case situation with me in work at all.

It just seems so frustrating when I have to be a full time student, truly focused on school, AND a full time employee, truly focused on my 40 hour a week job. Not to mention, wife.

So why am I doing this again?
What is it I'm trying to accomplish?
What is it I'm really wanting?

Sometimes I feel like my schooling is just to please others. My sisters, that never finished school until after they had children. My parents, Jason's parents. Everyone else in the world. But none of THEM have to do what I am. None of them have to figure out how to function all day 6 days a week at work AND school. But boy do they want me to!

It's just so much to do. So much to think about.

I don't mind going to school, or having a degree. But what I really want is a family. A chance to be at home with my children. Of course we can't start a family until Jason can support us fully on his own, which would likely require a degree. Fine. So I have some time. No worries. I'm happy to work on my PHT (Putting Hubby Through) and work. But where does me going to school fit in other than to make my life insane?

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Engagement Scrapbook

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Wedding Scrapbook

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

The best part of Halloween is...

knowing Christmas is just around the corner! I least I think it is, anyway. Halloween has never been my favorite holiday. I hate being scared. Why would anyone want to celebrate a negative feeling like fear? Then there's always the hassle of "what should I dress up as?" "Where am I going to get the money to pay for candy for all the kids that come knocking on my door?" It's beyond me. But people still do it. Every year. October 31st rolls around and everyone goes nuts. Just like the people at my work. They do something called "spooking" where we draw names and decorate each others desks with spider webs and candy. I decided to go with it. How bad could it be? When I went shopping for the decor, I found out! I really HATE Halloween. I found nothing worth buying-- nothing I wanted to put on someone elses desk. I bought their favorite candies and decided to take a stand. Instead of buying all the blood stained junk on the shelves I went home and dug out my 6 or 7 boxes labeled "Christmas". I found some red ornaments, some shiny ribbon, a pretty wreath, and other cute snowy, cheerful knickknacks that I wouldn't be too devastated to loose. I made my co-worker a sign to put on her computer monitor, "The best part of Halloween is knowing Christmas is just around the corner!" and cut out snowflakes and hung them from the ceiling. Everyone that saw it had an opinion. I didn't really care. I thought it was cute. At least she can say her desk didn't look like anyone else's!
It feels like so much has happened since I wrote last and yet I don't feel like I have much to write about! That tells you how boring I am. :P
My Mom and Dad are out of town this week and our lives already seem a bit quieter... except that they left their puppy with us! We love little Daisi. She has been having a lovely time playing with my Bandit and putting toys everywhere. She likes to get up early (because my Dad does), and that's been a much better alarm then any others I've ever had! It's been way fun watching two puppies! We took her to the Syracuse Nature Park yesterday and let her chase all the birds. She thought that was the best game! "Live action" toys never get boring to a little puppy! Maybe we should all take some advice from that and remember how great everything is, even when everything sucks!
My sister, Wendi, is so amazing. I've been really wanting to loose some weight and improve myself lately. I've been steadily putting on more and more until now-- I can barely fit into anything I own. Even my "fat" clothes! I've had enough. Time for a change. I've been looking into this plan and that plan, and trying everything. I'm sick of things that don't work. My mother in law is on Weight Watchers. She's lost over 70 pounds! I seen several people succeed on it, and I knew that's what I wanted to try. My mom looked into it, as did Wendi and her husband James. It's 40 dollars a month, which was a bit pricey for a poor newly wed like myself. So Wendi offered to get it for me as a birthday gift. I was so excited!! Since I started I've dropped 3 pounds and I'm more and more aware of everything I put in my mouth. I'm amazed at how unhealthy my habits have become. Hopefully this will be a good way to change those habits, to change my life for good. What's even better is that everyone else is on it with me!! Mom, James, Wendi and of course, Jason's mom! My Dad is doing something similar, which is way cool. It's so fun to say, "Hey, how are you doing on your points today?" :) Support is always so great! Next we're looking into work out programs. I really struggle working out in the winter. It's always so cold when you get up early, or try to do anything outside! My sister is considering doing lap swimming early in the morning. I think that sounds nice and warm- not to mention a full body workout!! Maybe Jason would be willing to come with me! He likes to swim. We'll see how that goes, and if I can fit it in with work and school both full time!
Jason and I had some fun this past week for "fall break". Weber didn't have classes for a Friday, and Jason and I get three paychecks this month-- all of these facts put together gave me a wave of revelation on Thursday night after work. I bought a lovely "wifey outfit" and kidnapped my husband! I told him I had a surprise for him and drove to Maverick. I picked up a half a tank of gas and a men's travel kit (since I "forgot to mention" we were staying over night somewhere...) with a toothbrush and shampoo. Then I took a very round about way to the Alaskan Inn. They gave me a great deal on a room since I didn't book it until 9pm! Jason was shocked... but pleased I think. It was so nice to just "get away" and not stress over anything for a few hours. We stayed in the Northern Lights room and enjoyed a manly action movie together. It was difficult to get up the next morning and come back to the real world. Sometimes I think all the stress of our lives makes everything more difficult, including our relationship. I really try to not let it get too strained by doing some fun things like this. Two or three weeks ago I even covered Jason's computer desk in green sticky notes that said things like. "The force is strong with this one" and "Bonni + Jason = <3". It was fun.
Well, that's my story. Tonight Jason and I are going on a double date with his parents, so I've got to finish up my work day and get all prettied up!

Tuesdays... Or is it Tuesdaies?

Whats up, ya'll? Life is just so crazy now days, but totally worth it! Jason and I keep busy, schooling, working, dating with other couples, and playing full time with our puppy. It's amazing how much time has passed. On Thursday we will have been married for three months. It's going so fast! I'm not even going to see our anniversary coming before it hits me on the head! We ought to start planning something! We talked about going on a trip just the two of us, since we didn't really get to do that much for our honeymoon. But I guess we'll see how much money we can come up with!!

Jason convinced me to start up with World of Warcraft again. It's been a fun release. Something cheap that we can do together. And besides that, Jason loves it. He's so proud his wife is "nerdy". You should have heard him today talking to another guy, "My wife plays, too! It's so much fun to have her on. She's a night elf." Then on in gibberish that I still don't understand. But it's fun. He offered to try something new for me, too, but I wasn't sure what to have him do! I'm pretty standard when it comes to things I like... any good ideas?

Other than that, life goes on as usual. Jason had a down day when he got turned down by McDonalds this past week. They said he wasn't qualified-- whatever that means. He's been a bit sad. But I've been cheerful and supportive. I tried to explain to him that I don't mind supporting us for now and it won't always be this way. We're going to school and moving forward, even with one more year behind us we'll have more to offer than we do right this second. Things will get better. I'm sure of it.

Speaking of doing better, I got a 97 on one of my tests this past week! I was so excited, because I don't really have tons of time to prepare for tests with my schedule. So I'm always lucky to squeak by with a C+ or B. So, horray for the 97!! Hopefully that will be a trend that continues. I'm not sure exactly what made that test so much easier, but I'll need to figure it out for sure!

Also this last week Jason and I went on a double date with Scott, one of my friends from high school. It was so much fun, even though we only had enough money to buy some ice cream and cones at wal mart! We played Tripoly and Scene It at our apartment and just had a good time laughing. It's so fun to get together with others. I'm really hoping Jason and I can find a group in our new ward, or some friends that are married so we can do that kind of thing on a regular basis. Even if it's cheap. It's fun to be with other couples, I think!!

Then we had conference. It was so wonderful. My Mom was a part of the choir that sang for the RS session. She got us the BEST tickets! My sister Wendi, Cosette (Jason's mom) and Sherilyn (Jason's aunt) all came with me and supported Mom singing. It was so awesome to be there in person and feel the Spirit. I had to work for the Saturday sessions, but I loved the Sunday sessions. It's so amazing to live in a day in age where we can share those kinds of things all across the world without a second thought. I'm excited to get my nephew's (Trenton's) letter to find out what he thought of watching conference in Africa!!

Well another week ahead of us... Yet nothing excited. We DO happen to have three paychecks this month, though... that's always exciting... Hmmmmm....

Confidence

I have decided. I can do anything. My work recently offered me a 40 hour position instead of a 30. I wasn't sure if I should take it... seeing how stressful my life already is. Being married, working and going to school full time seemed so overwhelming to me. But once Jason and I looked at the very scary budget situation we have made for ourselves, I knew I may not have much of a choice. I considered dropping a few classes to supplement my schedule, but decided against it. I shouldn't have to loose sight of my goals for an education in order to fully support my family. It may not be comfortable, but it is possible. I can do it. I can do anything. ... Right?

Day off?

Well, here it is... the day I was looking forward to all week. What a let down. It's been such a long and frustrating week. Starting school as been an exciting, stressful, and disorderly adventure. The first day I woke up with pink eye. On my way to my parents' house to get medicine, my tire blew. It was wonderful to have a husband take care of it while I sat in the car. Once we finally got the doughnut on and medicine for my eye, I called in sick to work. They were understanding, which certainly helped. The rest of the day, I napped. It sounds lovely, but it wasn't. My eye hurt all day, it made it difficult to lay comfortably and stop the pounding headache it caused. Tuesday was a bit better, I was able to attend class and work while wearing my glasses. Wednesday I wore my contacts and my eyes felt much better. Still, the day nearly killed me. Three classes in a row, then a full day at work was so overwhelming. I didn't have time to eat until nearly 6:30 that night. The whole day put me very much on edge. Stressed. Panicked. Why did I ever decide to go back to school and work, both full time?? I'm not sure. Thursday was less stressful, but I could hardly function due to the overwhelming pressure of Wednesday. It made me so tired. Friday was a bit better yet. Not as stressful, but still busy. At least I could function with hope of the weekend. But unfortunately it didn't deliver as I was hoping. Jason and I had planned to spend the day together at Lagoon. Time for fun and enjoyment, relaxation. We discussed it this morning and decided this week would not be the best to do that. We talked about replacing it with going to a movie instead. I've been dying to see "Time Travelers Wife", but Jason wouldn't hear of it. He ONLY wanted to see "Star Trek". Nothing else. So... that's what we did. It wasn't a bad movie, but I was in such a bad mood by the time we went to see it, it was hardly enjoyable. The junk food I thought would help me feel better just ended up making me sick. Everything just felt more and more frustrating as the day went on. So here we are, the end of my one day off... watching more Star Trek and waiting for the laundry to finish. At least Jason got what he wanted, I guess. But now I'm just dreading another overwhelmingly stressful week, without the recharge I was hoping to have in my favor. My school books have not all arrived in the mail, which even limits me in homework ability. Another stress on the pile. Falling behind would be a lovely start on my degree, wouldn't it? Agghhh!!

Full time students, working, and married.

Wow... so much, so much. But my life seems so little compared to others. Vickie, I love you, girlfriend! Things will get better and until they do let me be here for you! Megan, congrats on your first anniversary! It all sounds so lovely. Jason and I can't wait for the wonderful day when we can be sealed. :o) But until then, life keeps us busy. All of our schooling problems have been sorted out and we're both registered. Now if we could just figure out a way to pay for books until our grant money comes through... Jason is taking 4 classes all in evening times. I am also taking 4 classes, but all during the morning. Full time students, working, married. Boy, it's going to be a lovely four or five years. But everyone does it! We'll make it through happily enough. Jason has been having a few struggles with discouragement the last couple of days. It can be difficult to remain positive while being continually told no. So hopefully with school starting soon he'll gain back some lost confidence. The husband needs lots of love and support right now! Keeping up with that and a new job as been a bit overwhelming, but fun. The new job as given me lots to learn and look forward to. It's nice to once again be busy and full of things to do. So, keeping on!

Whoo... Change!

Holy crap so much is going on! So Jason and I spent an entire day doing the Weber run around. But is wasn't completely worthless (for once)! I AM going to make it in for this fall... barely. I need to take two acuplacer tests and register! But the problem with that, because there always has to be a problem, is that it's finals week! :-P So, I can't get into the testing center until Monday...which means I can't sign up for classes until the week before school actually starts! Poo. But, I still get to go and that rocks. Jason gets to go too and that makes me happy. He only needs to take one test, then he can register. So that's as far as it can go until Monday. But Monday in itself is going to be crazy because that's the day I start my new job! I'm so excited to go and learn new things, but my nerves are kicking up, too. Hopefully I won't make too much of a fool of myself. :o) So much is happening... but it's all good. My goals are moving along. A ran out of Slim Fast and I don't get paid again until Friday. So, I need to be extra careful on what I eat until I can get back into that swing. I'm going to borrow my sisters work out videos (Turbo Jam) to begin Monday. Hopefully that will help! Beyond that, I'm going to start digital scrapbooking again. I want to get all my wedding pictures, our announcements, and everything all put together. So that will be a fun activity to work on! So much to do and work on! I'm lovin it!

New haircut, diet, and job

It's time to do something new... or lots of somethings new. :o) I chopped my hair off, for starters. It's spikey in the back, short. I like it, but it's really different. I haven't quite figured how to style it cute. I'm working on it, though, and feeling better about it everyday. Next, I decided I'm ready to live a more healthy life. I'm married, I don't have the constant stress of an engagement on my plate any longer- there's no more excuses. So I'm starting up the slim fast plan and am working on an exercise plan. My goal is to work myself down to a size 7/8 jeans. Healthy, good weight. I don't want to dread swimming suit season next year. Then, on top of all that, if "that" wasn't enough to keep track of, I'm starting a new position on Monday! I'm still working for America First, but now I'll be in the Member Service Call Center instead of tellering. I can not even wait. The one thing I LOVE about my current job is that I get to talk to new people every day. Now I'll be able to do that, without the constant pressure of balancing out a drawer. All the better! Not too long ago I had a huge outage ($951.00). It was terrible. I made myself sick over stressing about it. So done with that! AND... the best part is the raise! I'll get a 60 cent an hour raise, which will more than pay for my travel to Roy. Then add all that in with the fact that when everything works out at Weber, they'll be able to work around a student schedule, and it's perfect!! Can you believe it?! Better than perfect! Now if only things WOULD work out for school... that'd be nice! It's been so crazy, because of my name changing and all the mess with transcripts. I'm not going to make it in this fall for sure. Jason's pressing to get everything in, but he's not even so sure it'll happen. I pray it will, because I know it's difficult on him to just be home 24/7. He's such a big help around the apartment, I mean, it's always spotless, but how boring is that everyday? He's still hunting around for a job, so if anyone hears about anything, please let us know! But really, life all around is wonderful! I'm so happy to be married. Some mornings I wake up to see Jason beside me and I have to fight back the tears of joy. After so long, he's here! It always amazes me.
Vickie, my favorite day of the week is Saturday. I never work past 3:00pm (for now at least... but that's going to change soon!), and I always look forward to spending the weekends with my honey. Be that out or in, we always find something fun to do. :o)

Been A Long Time...

And so much has happened!! I've gotten married, of course, and my wedding day was picture perfect. Jason's little brother Tyler wore a red tie (and red was only meant for the Bride and Groom), but I didn't even notice until I saw my pictures. That's my biggest complaint. We didn't forget anything, my hair and make up looked lovely (thanks to a talented and fabulous Vickie), my bouquet was lovely, everyone was there that could have been, the weather was nice... everything was wonderful. I did miss my nephew and brother in law, both of whom are serving our country, but they'll enjoy the pictures. That night Jason and I stayed at the Alaskan Inn. It didn't hit me that we were married until about 3:00am the next morning. I had to wake Jason up to tell him. Poor guy. (But he loves me. :) The next day we were planning to go to Lagoon, but decided we were much too tired. (Especially when you have a crazy wife that wakes you up in the middle of the night to tell you things you already know!) But, getting married is also very exhausting! Even without our open house the same night! So that next day we visited our families instead. My parents had our wedding gifts, so we opened those and got to talk to everyone. Then we went to the Mills home and I nearly fell asleep while Jason talked with his Dad. It was kinda weird to have Jason laying next to me in front of his parents. I'm not honestly so sure his Dad was cool with it either. But what can he say when we're properly married? Nothing. Ha! :) Love that part. After that, Jason and I said good bye and headed to the Anniversary Inn for our second night married. Thanks to a wonderful Maid of Honor, Crystal! I honestly would have lost my mind without her! We got to stay in one of the top rooms, African Safari. The bed was SOOO comfy! King Size, Itelli Gel... Nice! Jason and I ordered pizza for dinner and had it delivered to our room while we watched "How to Loose a Guy in 10 Days". It was so much fun to just relax and be together. Especially since the next day wasn't relaxing at all. We moved as soon as we got back from Logan and did our open house that night. Crazy! Then that weekend we got everything settled at home and we were back to work on Monday. It's been a happy three weeks-- married life rocks! We have had our share of heartbreaks, though. On July 23, my sweet Lady passed away. We were expecting it because she was having so many health problems with her heart and breathing. But it was still so difficult to see her leave. I found out on my way to work. By the time I got there, it was no longer a question of my family needing me, but if my work would let me leave. They did, thankfully. Jason and I drove to Logan once again to bury Lady in my sisters backyard. Dad said a little tearful prayer, and that was that. It was a difficult day for everyone, but my Dad most of all. I don't think I've ever seen him so upset. It was wonderful to have Jason beside me, being my best friend. Someone to cry with and understand. Other than that family crisis, things have been fairly lovely. Jason and I have both applied to Weber for this fall. Jason's FAFSA is turned in and ready to go, mine is waiting my name change. It's nice to feel a fresh start to life, and even more so with a partner beside you. My work wasn't thrilled about housing 5 students, so it looks like evening and online classes for me! (Yay.) :-P But, it's just such a blessing to be going back at all, I won't complain too loudly. Today I had a chat with my honey and set some new goals for life. (Don't you love those "life altering" conversations?) I want to do more things for myself and feel the accomplishment. Jason thinks (and probably correctly) that I've spent too much time in the last few years of my life worrying about him, doing things for him, and trying to get married that I've lost focus on myself. And now, since we only have our Bandit to entertain our time, seems ideal to find that focus once again and put it in balance with being a wife. But wish me luck... It seems like so much. :) But ready or not... Life, here I come!

38... 37...

Ah! Engagements need to be shorter than 18 months! I'm totally going crazy being nearly a month away. Although, I will admit that it certainly helps to have everything planned. Jason and I have has several talks with our parents and decided that "The Lodge" in Brigham City (it's actually in Perry, but no one knows where that is) would be a perfect compromise. Nice, but still reasonable. And they care for everything! Love that part! So we've reserved our date there and have nearly everything paid in full. Yay for wedding planners! Then instead of a big reception that night, we're going to do an open house the weekend after our wedding for everyone to come. It's going to be lovely!! Now if they just had people that could help us figure out this whole apartment business! Jason has decided that he should attend UVU next year. So we've been looking for places in Utah county. We found a nice one bedroom within our price range in Springville and we've paid a first months rent and deposit. Then when we filled out the application, the landlord told us that we don't qualify without a co-signer. *frown* Back to begging the parents, I guess! I've also had some trouble getting transferred down there. I applied for a 40 hour position at the American Fork branch, but didn't get it. I'll have to keep my eyes open. I suppose I could go to a different credit union or bank, but if I don't have to, I'd prefer not to. Jason has a job now with Vector marketing, but it's very unsteady income. Sales. :-P He's been back on the job hunt to find something more reliable down there, as well. Let's just hope it comes together soon! Other than that, things are going well. Jason and I both has our bouts with the cold/flu bug that's being passed around. Thank heavens that's over! I bought a new wedding dress because I gained too much weight to fit into my original one. *frown again* But I like the new one, and I am trying to take off a few pounds. I just need to figure out how to do it with all the stress of getting married!! Bandit is doing well, though I can't wait to have our own place for him! It always makes me sad to keep him locked up all day while I'm at work. Jason and I talked it over and canceled our honeymoon trip to Estes Park Colorado. We decided that as much as a trip would be nice, the blessing of just having some time together doesn't need to cost us that much. We still have our first night reserved at Alaskan Inn. Then after that we'll likely spend some nights camping and getting everything settled into our apartment. I still think it sounds like fun, and we are certainly planning on Walt Disney World when we get sealed! So, life is good! If only it would come faster...

Two Months, Four Days and counting!!

Well, it was a fun weekend. Getting paid always makes it fun. Today Jason and I headed to the movies. I told him I wanted to see "Ghosts of Girlfriends Past"-- real chick flicky. But when I went in (while he waited in the car), I decided to surprise him and get tickets to "Wolverine Origins". We did lunch and then came back to the theatre. I totally had him surprised when I handed him his ticket stub to the movie HE wanted to see (and I had refused to see before the moment I bought the tickets). Then I went to go potty really fast before the ads could end. On the way back I decided to stop and get him some of his favorite candies and soda. :) He was so thrilled. I was so happy to be able to make him happy. It was a wonderful afternoon.
My cell phone screen has been blacking out, so on Saturday Jason and I bought me a new one! Touch screen and everything. Super cool. It's called the Dare. There's one newer, but I didn't like it as much. It was fun to shop and go out to dinner. :) Very fun date night.
We also went to three receptions, Lisa Roberts', Lindsay Cook's, and Rex Colmen's. They were all perfectly lovely, but different from one another. Rex's was at Tuscany Gardens in Roy. Very pretty and expensive reception center. We stayed for the first dance and cake cutting. It made me cry. I don't mean to go to pieces at weddings, but somehow feeling like mine should have happened already makes it difficult not to. Lisa had hers in a church house, decorated. Lovely, lovely. Lindsay's was in her uncles backyard. By the time I went to those two, I was more stable. So, no tears that time. After going to all of them, Mom and I had another run in over mine in coming up in July. I came home and told her a reception center would be perfectly wonderful. Then she went off on how expensive it is, how she'd have to take out a loan to get it paid for, how she hasn't even seen the bridesmaid dress we're suppose to have ordered by this Thursday. She walked out of the house without really explaining herself, leaving me to vent at my sweet Jason. He is SOOO perfectly understanding... What would I do without him?! (Likely go crazy, by now...)
Anyway, I ended up at Jason's house that evening, trying to figure out how to make this wedding GO. His parents sat us down and talked with us about other options. They suggested canceling the reception all together, since a lot of people wouldn't be able to make it on a weeknight. I was all for that... standing in line was never really something I wanted to do for three hours. Jason seemed to accept it as well, knowing the reason he wanted to throw one was for his extended family, which again, wasn't likely to come on a Wednesday anyway. In place of a reception, his parents recommended a nice dinner. No decorations, no clean up or set up-- nice and easy. Not to mention small. (I was happy about that part.) As a matter of fact, the only suggestion his parents made that I wasn't happy with was to have the ceremony in a RS room in a church. :-P I just paid $2500 for photography... I need at least the CEREMONY of all things to look somewhat decent. Someplace to take pictures that day. So, I've been looking for a place to host that. Everyone voted Maddox in Perry for dinner. I love that place. I know they do receptions there as well, so maybe we could have the ceremony there. Less travel. They aren't open on Mondays, so I haven't had a second to find out how much that cost would be. Hopefully something reasonable!!!
Mom didn't seem pleased with this idea, but at this point, I'm not exactly sure HOW to make her pleased. This is completely about Jason and me, anyway... I still don't know what to do about bridesmaid dresses. I've loved the ones I've found, but I have no clue how to fit them in budget... Everything just seems so tight. The guest list has even been cut. Several times. So, just make it work at this point.
On a less stressful note, Bandit has done well in his classes. This week we're doing lick your lips, go to blankie, and backup. It's been fun to teach him and to have him learning new things.
Mothers Day is coming up. I wish I had special plans, but I think a card and a hug is my humble gift this year. Nothing else too exciting to report, I suppose. Another week of work is looming. Hopefully I can focus better than I have been. I know I need to keep my head straight when I'm there so my drawer will balance, but I've been struggling with that. Lots of other things on my mind at the moment...

April showers, BE GONE!

Well, quite a bit has happened since the family reunion. It's been a busy week! On Sunday my Mom randomly went off on me about having my wedding at the nature park in Syracuse. She went on and on about how "it was going to be a mess" and "setting up and taking down will be impossible" and blah blah blah. She said we should do a reception center. But, those are super expensive. But she thinks it's worth it. No hassles or stress... they take care of everything. Anyway, it was kinda out of the blue for my mom. Monday I got my nails done for our engagement pictures on Tuesday. They were way fun. We took them on main street down town Salt Lake. Jason and I laughed a lot and kissed a lot. :) Hopefully they turn out well. We should be able to see them pretty soon and start looking at invites. On Wednesday I scheduled an appointment with Castlebrook (which is under new management and it's actually called "the Castle" now) during my lunch break. Jason has never been a fan of reception centers, he says they cost too much and they're not worth the price. But once we got to have a tour, I think he was more impressed than he expected to be. Mom loved it, of course, even with the steep price tag. I think wherever we have it will be wonderful-- I'm just so happy to FINALLY be getting married that the rest just disappears in my mind. I mean, it would certainly be nice to have a brides room, and no worries about bugs and AC. But no matter what it ends up being, it will be lovely. After our appointment I went back to work with my Wendy's bag in hand, thinking that I could at least munch a bit because we'd been so slow. I didn't have a second to eat while we were there, so munching seemed good. But I guess not. My lead teller got quite cross with me for having food out. I didn't really understand the big difference between fries and crackers (which the girl next to me was eating), but whatever. So I apologized and told her it wouldn't have again. Today is Thursday and I'm wiped out. It's been such an emotional high week, pictures, wedding planning, etc. It just takes all my energy. Luckily tomorrow I have a short day from 12:00-4:00 and I'm off Saturday. Maybe I'll be able to catch up a bit. Bandit has done very well on his training this week. He's best at bye bye-- even when I left for work today he waved bye bye to me. It was so precious! We're still struggling on spin, but I think he's starting to understand more and more. So hopefully we'll be all ready for class again come Saturday! :) Yay for puppy training!!

Relaxing Sunday

Despite my pessimism about the Mills' reunion, it was very fun. Jason didn't sleep very well the night before, but we still got up at 3:30 to be on the road by 4am. It was a long drive! We kept trading off driving, so that neither of us would fall asleep. We tried to find a Carl's Jr to go to for breakfast, but we ended up at a McDonald's. We got there right on time (8am) to help start breakfast. After that Jason taught me to drive the four wheelers. We went on a ride, just the two of us. I tried some hills after I got the hang of it. It was so awesome and fun!! Then we headed back to camp to rest a bit before lunch. The wind was awful, so I took refuge in the tent. I read Eclipse and Jason fell asleep in the lawn chair outside. After a few hours I came out to get him. He was so sunburned! Poor boy! Then the rain stated. Everyone quickly packed up and got lunch out. We all grabbed plates full of food and ran to our cars. After Jason and I ate we decided it was time to go. We drove in the rain until Orem. It just poured and poured. Again we kept switching out. I decided to stop in to the University Mall to look for bridesmaid dresses. My poor honey was so bored and tried! And we were both so dusty and yucky after spending the morning in the sand. The ladies were very nice and helpful. They certainly have a good selection... if your colors are hot pink, yellow, or orange. But as far as Navy Blue goes... not so much. Then the ordering time is longer than Modest By Design, where I found the other dresses I liked. But at least I tried. Then we hurried home to get showered before Bandit's training class. That turned out pretty well, but our puppy was so wound up from spending the day in his kennel, he couldn't really focus. Next week I'll make sure he gets a longer walk and more time out of his kennel before we go. Hopefully that will help. :) This class is more obedience training and tricks. This week we're learning to wave bye bye, take a bow, and spin. Bye bye is fairly easy, Bandit was already good with shake. Then take a bow has gone well so far. It's just spin that we're working more and more on. So that will be fun this week. Our engagement pictures are on Tuesday, so we're thrilled about that. It's going to be so fun. I'm getting my nails done tomorrow and everything will be ready! I can't wait to get started!!

Fianlly! A Day Off!!

Whew! Glad that work week is over! Don't get me wrong, I love my job, but sometimes it's nice to catch up on the laundry and housework! :) It's been a fun week all the way around. Yesterday I got to hang out with my wonderful girlfriends, Anna and Vickie. We went to the nature park and walked our puppies. They mostly just ignored each other... Silly, silly. We also got to look at some bridesmaid dresses. That was fun too! It looks like I'll need to order them pretty soon to get them here by July! That's something I hadn't really thought of. But I'm sure it will be great. My Mom and I have been shopping quite a bit this week, too. I got new jeans (YAY!!) and some cute "springy" tops. I even found an outfit for our engagement pictures coming up on Tuesday! They're going to be so pretty! I just hope the weather stays decent. Tomorrow is the ever dreaded Mills' family reunion. Jason and I decided it would be safer (and cleaner) for Bandit to stay home. He'll have fun at his class that night, anyway. It's not like he's spoiled rotten as it is!! So, lots of fun going on. Jason and I have set some new goals for his job hunt, hopefully that will help. Does anyone know of any openings??

Just another Manic Monday

It was a fun weekend, date with Spencer and everything. Saturday was a nice day. We took Bandit for a nice long walk at the Nature Park and talked. We discussed getting our budget in line for the wedding and our future. We're on our way!! It seems like everyone is getting married! I can't wait to join the crowd! :) Sunday Jason and I just relaxed. We're reading New Moon to each other. It's so fun to hear his relaxing voice. Very good weekend in preparation for a very long week!! I work long days through Wednesday. But Thursday is only a three hour day, and I'm off Friday and Saturday for the Mills' family reunion. Busy, busy!! We're trying to decide what to do with Bandit. We could leave him home in his kenal, or we can bring him. It's just so sandy and dirty down there!! He has a class that night... I don't really want to take him all messy! But I don't want him to just be home alone either... What to do, what to do.

Blind Dates

So last night Jason and I doubled with Spencer, who got set up on a blind date. It was pretty fun! Jason and I have date nights every week, but it's been a while since we've gone with anyone other than just ourselves! We went to Olive Garden for dinner, which is a rare treat for me! Jason isn't generally a fan of Italian, so we don't go often. It was so yummy!! The calamari there is FaNtAsTiC!! (Even if I DO know what it is!) The girl Spencer brought certainly can talk up a storm!! I don't think any of us said hardly anything all night! It wasn't bad, just not something I was used to. I'm usually the one that brings up a conversation and keeps it going. But not this time! After a very filling dinner, we went to Sparetime in Roy. We did glow in the dark mini golf. It was pretty fun, because we didn't keep score or play by the rules at all. (hee hee!) By the end of that we were all pretty tired, so we took Spencer's date home and called it a night. Jason had to drive, I was so wiped out! I haven't been sleeping very well lately. I've pulled something in my left arm somehow and it HURTS like the devil! It's been over a week now, I keep thinking it will get better but it hasn't yet. If anything, it's been hurting more... like to a point that I can't get comfortable enough to sleep. :( Lame. Hopefully in a few more days it will quit. I hope it does before next Saturday for sure! That's going to be a busy day. Jason and I are going down to his family reunion in Southern Utah during the day. Then we start Bandit's new class that night!! I'm not really looking forward to the reunion, last year's was pretty...lame. Windy and sandy and boring. Nothing really to do or see. Just sit-- in the sand. Blah. Bandit's class should be fun, though. He'll love being able to get out every week and work on his training daily. He's such a good puppy! I've been thinking, papillions are bred to be show dogs and Bandit is within criteria... maybe it would be fun to have a champion puppy! A lot of work, for sure, but I know Bandit would love it. He loves any kind of attention-- training, walking, playing, anything. Besides all that, maybe Jason won't want a bird so bad if we're spending so much time with our puppy. He's such a silly honey! He's been researching cockiteils and cockatoos for a while now, and he's decided that after the wedding we should get one. I don't know how I feel about that... Sometimes I don't really feel like we give Bandit enough attention-- how could we add to that? My Mom is terrified of birds, she would never visit us for sure. All I've ever heard of birds is that they're loud, messy and kind of boring. I mean, a dog you can walk, play with and cuddle. A bird just sits in a cage all day chripping and pooping. Jason thinks they're cool because they talk. But Bandit can, too, just not with words. It's pretty funny to watch when Bandit wants something. He certainly CAN talk. :) He'll tell you all about it. Oh, well. I guess we'll see. We're certainly not in a position to get a birdy until we're married, anyway. So we still have two months to figure it out. By that time, I'll hopefully have my level 5 at work along with the pay raises! I'm a bit sad that I didn't get my level 4 this past week. I was waiting, waiting, waiting for my stats from last month to come back. Well, they did, but they still weren't high enough. Lame!! So I get to wait another month. Just wait. I've done everything I can, so... keep tellering! Jason and I are considering finding a place in the Orem area to live, so I may not be at this job very much longer. Jason wants to get back into school next year and he's really liked UVU. I'm happy that he's found something he wants to do. Now just how do we get there?... Just keep on going, I guess. :)

Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming swimming swimming...

Easter Pictures

Missionaries, Jobs, and Puppy!

It's been such a fun day off! Jason and I got to spend some time together this morning. It was so nice to just relax and watch movies. I rented "Seven Pounds" from Redbox. It made me cry. But it really has a good meaning, and made me feel so blessed that I have the life I do.
Then we headed to Salt Lake to see Elvia (my roommate from college) before she enters the MTC tomorrow. We went out to lunch at the Garden. It was so yummy! She seems so happy, I'm thrilled for her. It's nice to see her prepared to preach the gospel and bless others' lives. What an amazing example she's been to me. :)
Jason got an unexpected call to meet with TSA (airport security) tonight for a meeting in the hiring process. I am so excited about that!! What a blessing it would be if he got that job!! Part time employees make over $30,000 a year!!! Plus my salary, we'd be better than well off.
So while he's there, I've been playing with the puppy. He's so silly and wonderful. He's been such an awesome addition to our little family. He was such a hit this Easter weekend-- everyone got a kick out of how silly he acted with his bunny ears on. All the puppies got their picture taken with the bunny ears and a bone chewy treat. Such a good Easter!
It turned out to be such a fun weekend with everyone. Jason let me buy $30 of scenty stuff as a gift! (Yay!) My Mom gave me a coupon for a shopping date with her for new bras and jeans. (Which I totally need!) Jason's Mom gave Jason and I both an adorable plaque that says "In the Strength of the Lord, I can do all Things.". It was so sweet of her to think of us. My sister Wendi threw a big party for all of my side of the family. Jason and I hid an entire box of Easter Eggs in the backyard for the kids. My honey is so creative- it was fun to watch him think of fun places to hide them. He's going to be such a good Daddy!! Afterwards we spent some time with Jason's family. They did an Easter Devotional and desert. We brought Bandit along, and all had a good time watching him. Jason's Mom fed him nearly an entire steak as a treat... again, no wonder he loves her! I'm happy to see the Mills' warming up. It's awesome.
Tomorrow marks half of April being gone. Whoo!! Counting down to that wedding date! Jason and I are so thrilled. Nearly everything is planned, we're designing the reception invites this week. It's been so fun, even with all the drama. Although, the drama would be nearly unbearable if I didn't have Jason to help me through it all. Good thing he's sticking around! I looked around for some bridesmaid dresses today on my way home from Salt Lake. I found some I liked at Kathleen's, but then I found ones I liked better (that were cheaper, too) at Modest By Design. I even tried that one on, to see what it looked like on a person. I totally love it. I'll have to take my bridesmaids out one of these days, to see what they think. After all, they're the ones that have to wear them! It's been fun. I just can't wait to see it all come together. :)

Easter Eve

It's been a fun filled weekend with Keri's family here to visit! They came down from Smithfield on Friday and are staying until Sunday evening. Friday night Keri and I went Easter shopping for her children. That was so fun! I didn't get anything, Jason and I bought Bandit's Easter last week! He got four new toys, treats, and bunny ears! AND his next training class. That just doesn't start until April 25. We're all way excited though! Jason and I have been reviewing with him all of his previous class work. He actually remembers most of it and does it well. :) Good puppy! He is having a bit of a rough weekend with Tashia (Keri's puppy) sharing the already too small space between Bandit and Lady. Tashia has a serious complex about being in charge. Tonight she jumped off the couch and attacked my Bandit!! It was so surprising, and so out of place-- Bandit was fine, but he did yipe. Needless to say, Tashia was in big trouble. Kinda scary! Oh, well. Other than that, things are going well. Work this week has been a bit weird, because of my schedule. I was off Monday, Tuesday I worked from 12-3, Wednesday from 3-6 then I had full days for the rest of the week. By Saturday, I was kinda wiped out. It was just different than most weeks. Hopefully this next week I'll be able to catch up my sleep and everything. Jason and I have his family reunion coming up, which I'm NOT looking forward to. Southern Utah. Blah! I'm not a fan of sand everywhere! :( Oh, well. If I marry the boy, I marry the family, right? The four wheelers are fun, though. I guess I'll look forward to that and the time with my sweet honey, of course! See, always find the positive.

Three Months!!

It's been a very good day for getting things done! I got to sleep in this morning after talking with my mom late last night about wedding plans. Then I went to the gym and worked out for an hour. (Because exercise gives you endorphins, endorphins make you happy, and happy people just don't shoot their husbands.) It was actually really nice. I did the treadmill today and I got to watch 'Home Improvement' on the TV! I like that show. :) Then I came home and get ready for the day. Jason and I went out to lunch and then took our Bandit out for a walk. Then it was time for work! I had a training today up in Riverdale, products and services. It wasn't too bad, we just talked about cross selling to members. No worries. Now if only my stats would come back high enough to get my level!! That's what I really need!! Now I'm home and chillin for the evening. I've set a date for our engagement pictures and I can't wait to get those done!! They're going to be so lovely. We're taking them out in Salt Lake City, because I wanted some urban pictures to compare with all of our park pictures. Jason's still plugging away for the job hunt. I'm actually really proud of all the work he's done. On Tuesday night the stake president gave us a new list of places to check into and said he'd have more for Jason next week as well. Hopefully that will help! Something has to stick sooner or later! (Or at least, that's the plan.) Jason and I also set some new goals- daily devotionals, working out, and consistent weekly date nights. It was nice to just sit down and talk about a plan of action for getting things rolling. From today, we only have three months left until the wedding! (Not that anyone's counting, of course...) I've asked Vickie and Anna to be my bridesmaids and Jason's asking James and Spencer to be groomsmen. It's going to be so awesome to have an actual "wedding party"! (That doesn't involve all the drama of sisters...) It's been a bit difficult with our families. Everyone is disappointed that we're getting married civilly and they're almost unsupportive because of it. :( Jason and I have decided, though, that we're not going to allow the drama to tear us apart anymore. In the end, it's about the two of us and our MARRIAGE. Not the cake, parties, flowers or the families. It really brings meaning to "cleaving unto your spouse and none other"-- including parents! That's made a big difference for us. Every time our families were unhappy we'd end up fighting. It's nice to let that fall behind us. Other than that, things are going good- just pressing forward. Only three more months!!

Crazy people...

Okay, so at work today we had the craziest member come through!! He went to the ATM and tried to withdrawal $600. Well, the ATMs have a limit of $500 cash a day to any member. So, he called the drive thru concerned that it hadn't given him his money. The girls tried to explain to him that the transaction hadn't gone through his account, and the limit on the ATMs. They asked him to come in, but he got more and more upset. Yelling at our back up lead, until finally our lead teller got involved. He yelled at her to come out and help him. She said she didn't feel it was safe to leave the building. And it wasn't!! Not with the way he was acting! Anyway, he ended up leaving in a huff and giving everyone else a story to tell for the rest of the day. That was certainly interesting. Everything else has gone well. Jason has been spending time with Spencer today, which is good for them both. They haven't seen each other in a while, and it's good that they get some boy time. But I get to be with my honey tonight! :) Jason and I have done well on our goals to move forward and get married this July. Jason's been doing his faithful job hunting. I need to be a bit more faithful in my workouts to fit into my dress. Our honeymoon is reserved and ready, my new ring (our wedding ring!) looks lovely... everything has turned out wonderful. I even called Syracuse City about putting up Tiki Lamps in the Nature Park. They said that would be fine, as long as they are 20 feet away from anything that would catch fire-- the building or tables, etc. That seemed pretty reasonable to me. I was actually surprised that they'd allow it! I think it will be wonderful, a good mood setter and help for the all the bugs! Perfect. :)

La La La La La!!!

Isn't it funny how times get difficult then suddenly blissful? Today has been PERFECT! Unexpectedly so, but still perfect. :) I slept in for a long long time, because Jason and I stayed up late watching Oceans 12. I called Jason and we set up a time to meet for the day. I got ready, ate breakfast and brushed Bandit. Then my cell phone rang. It was the cake lady I had originally set for our December and April wedding plans. She said that my wedding cake was just coming out of the oven and she just needed to know what time to be there on Friday. WHAT?! I guess when I canceled the Lion House, I expected them to contact her, they always had in the past. But I guess they decided not to!! So, I told her I would come down to pick up whatever she had done and pay her for the trouble. It was just out of the blue! That ended up to be quite the adventure. We had about an hour to kill, so Jace and I decided to stop by Aarons jewelery. We asked about melting my original ring down to have it set on a plain solitaire band. They said it wouldn't save us any money. *frown* But then she said, "Okay, you guys have been in here three or four times. What is it that you're looking for exactly? Let's find it for you!! Let's get what you want done. What price range are we looking at? What do you like?" The next thing we knew we had picked out two or three rings that I really loved all at the right price. I liked one better than the others, so... we bought it!! Jason is so amazing! He'd had some savings set aside (that he didn't tell me about, of course...) and there you have it! They had the ring ready for me that night, and poof! All done! It's so pretty... I completely love it. It's nice to have a ring that I'm proud to wear for my honey. Then we sped to Salt Lake and picked up our cake. We paid half price for it, but at least she got something for the misunderstanding. I really did feel terrible about the whole thing. We brought it home and ate the top layer. It was so rich!! Jason loved it, of course, but it's not my favorite. I'm looking forward to the cake we have ordered for July! White cake and raspberry filling!! Mmm... After Jason had his fill we did a devotional and called it a night. I have a full day of work tomorrow, so off to bed!! It's been such a great day!

Making Up

The best part of fighting is making up. *smile* Things have been going much better. Jason and I have finally had sometime to ourselves. We talked everything out, found better ways to work on the things we need to get done. He's been very understanding about the stress I've been under with the wedding planning. He recommended that we take a bit of a break and schedule ourselves a little better. That way it's not all crammed in to a short time frame. We do have plenty of time to get everything done, still three full months. He also offered to help a bit more. He's so wonderful. We also set some goals for his job search. He seems more confident and focused, which certainly helps.Hopefully things will go a bit faster with some of the new guidelines we discussed. It's so nice to get things worked out.

Other than that, today has been a lovely day. I worked, but it was really slow. Nothing too intense. Right after work Jason and I ran to take Bandit to his vet appointment. Just regular shots and a check up. While we were in the waiting room, we saw a couple leave that was very upset. The man carried out a leash... and no dog. After they were gone, the nurse carried out the dog they had put down. I really tried to prepare myself and not look, but it seemed automatic. They had a sheet over its head, but I still wanted to cry. I hugged Bandit until it was our turn fifteen minutes later. I'm grateful I don't need to go through anything like that just yet. I don't know if I could take it. Luckily I didn't have much longer to think about it, because Bandit's appointment took all my attention. It went well, for a first time. Bandit was so nervous, but he seemed okay once he trusted the nurse. He never did warm up to the vet very well... He's very healthy, thank heavens. Papillions generally don't weigh over 10 pounds, but Bandit weighs 14. The vet said he's just built big for his breed and he's not over weight. He runs around like mad, so I can't see how he possibly could be. Silly puppy...

After that we all went for a walk together as a family. It was perfect weather, not too hot or cold, maybe just a bit windy. We went to Steed Park, somewhere new for us. Bandit always enjoys the new smells and sounds. Jason and I talked about wedding plans and our future together. It was so wonderful to hear about our goals for a family and our lives. It's nice just to be best friends, as well as lovers. We walked for over an hour and Bandit loved it. Jason and I loved it too, but we were sore afterwards. I don't think we'll ever wear Bandit out!

What a wonderful Saturday.

Jason and I did make up a bit last night. He came over and we talked a few things out. But today things just seem to have gotten worse between us, as if last night didn't happen at all. Please keep us in your prayers.

It's been a very frustrating day. I got some things done, but not like I wanted. I got to go to lunch with my mom and sister. That turned out okay. After that, Jason and I got together. We stopped at Syracuse Community Center to find out about the Jensen Nature Park Visitors Center. $500 for the entire day, 6am to midnight. I didn't think it was too badly priced, for a wedding. The only thing about it is it's small. Only 77 people allowed in the building at a time. That shouldn't be a problem for the ceremony, but I'm not sure what to do about the reception. They said we're allowed to set up things outside, though, so maybe that would work. Just serve everyone inside, hand them a cake and set them out. Hopefully, in July the evening will be nice. The other thing is tables. They have 10 long tables and 77 chairs to use. That works for serving and displays, but for guests to eat on? I don't know... that seems a bit uncomfortable for a reception. Round tables seem more traditional. I guess we'll see. After all that Jason and I took Bandit to petsmart to get him groomed. They did so well- tubing, brushing, clipping the toe nails, brushing the teeth. It was wonderful. He feels so soft and lovely. They were also very kind to Jason and I. During the time Bandit was in, Jason and I shopped. We got him signed up for the next training classes, (whoo!) and we also cruised the mall. It was fun for a while. We ended up in the Lovesac store. Jason and I have wanted a movie lounger for quite a while. Of course, the prices are all going up now. The manager in the store was wonderful to work with, he seemed very flexible. Our problem is money. Always the money. Jason still doesn't have a job, and my tax return seems to be paying for everything. I really have been trying to be positive and supportive to my sweet Jason. But today on the way home I lost it. I was so upset about everything. We just have so much we want, things that we've decided on for the next four months. How are we going to do it all on just my salary? A new ring for me, a honeymoon, an apartment... all hundreds of dollars a piece. Where does that all come from? I wish I knew. Jason has been playing WOW so much, three nights a week, and that's been crawling under my skin. Between it all, we didn't part on very good terms. Once Jason told me if I ever felt mistreated to tell him "I'm not feeling very much like a princess". So, I texted him that. He replied, "You're not acting like one, either." I cried. Since then, I've been truly considering canceling the wedding. I don't deserve to be mistreated like that. I know he's under a lot of stress. Who wouldn't be in his position? But mistreating me with that stress is unacceptable. What would happen when we have children and the stress is worse? I love him, without a doubt. But what to do? ...

Chillin'

It's been a pretty good start to the week. I worked in the drive thru yesterday. That's my favorite. You certainly keep busy there and that helps the day go by faster. It's also fun to get a chance to talk to your coworkers. I'm off today and tomorrow. Today I just ran all day. I reserved our wedding cake (officially) and gave her the ribbon Jason picked out. It's nice to get everything going. We also went down and bought Jason's wedding ring. It's so lovely. It fits him, his personality, perfectly. I'm so happy we actually found one he liked!! I feel like we had to search everywhere! So, that's done and hiding in my jewelery box until July. Jason and I went out to lunch at Iggy's. That was so yummy! We also looked at Layton Meadows Apartments. I've always liked them, the central location, the allowing of pets, the walking distance to my work. Jason seemed to like them as well, so we'll see where that leads. They're running a special on one bedrooms if you move in by Saturday. $80 less a month for rent. I wish we were ready, that Jason had a job and we could get in on that. But oh, well... Waiting for July wouldn't be bad, either. It's all good. After all that Jason went home to raid on WOW and I started Spring Cleaning. I got my bedroom done, but I still have a ways to go before I'm done. Bandit keeps watching me like I'm crazy for sorting through every single piece of paper I own. "What a waste of time, Momma... Why don't we just play instead?"... He's so wonderful. My perfect baby boy!

Busy Weekend

It certainly has been crazy the last few days. Thursday I took teller test four, the last test I need to get my level (pay raise). I didn't pass, but just barely. We reviewed everything right after though, and that helped. I felt so bad, because I changed my answers on over half of the questions I got wrong!! Silly Bonni... I get to take it again next Thursday. Now that I know a bit more about what to expect, it should go much smoother. So that didn't turn out too bad. Friday was my day off. Jason and I spent the day together planning more wedding things. His parents bought us lunch. That was sweet. After that we got to meet with our cake lady. She is so awesome. I'm glad we picked her! We're getting a 3 layer white cake with raspberry filling and cream cheese frosting. It's going to be decorated in blue and white (of course, our happy wedding colors!) with red rose petals to surround it. Just the perfect "patriotic touch" for a July wedding. Then I decided, since it was payday, that I wanted to go shopping. We went to Walmart to spend a little. We actually ended up with centerpieces that we both loved for our reception. It's funny, because I've always been set on real flowers for everything, but Jason can even make fake flowers look good! It was awesome to get his ideas and my ideas in the same place. We bought those, just to check something else off the list. Jason even recommended that we put them together for our date night this week-- why not get it done and out of the way? I completely agree. :) That will be fun. I also found some work out clothes that I liked. I've been going to the gym quite a bit this week. Today I did the bicycles and my legs hurt so bad!! I'm trying to fit back into my wedding dress! Silly cakes and candies... making me workout. After my trip to the gym and a lovely cold shower, Jason and I got to go to his little brothers' Eagle Court of Honor. It was an amazing program. The bishopric spoke, Jason presented a slide show video (that was BEYOND GREAT!!), and lots of tears were shared. Very touching, all together. Things are really looking like they are coming together for us. His extended family were all very happy to see us and hear of our plans in July. Even his parents took the time to thank me for helping in the kitchen. The only thing is Jason is down to the bottom of the job barrel. He is even going to apply at Lagoon for this summer. He's worked there once before and hated it. But I know that he's willing to see our wedding through, even if it means Lagoon. He's so wonderful.Things have completely improved with him.Yay for moving forward... finally!

Wedding Planning!!

What a fun day off! I slept in until 9:30am. (I must have been a bit behind on sleep!) Then I called my honey to get him up for the day, but surprise!! He'd been up since 6am finishing a project so we could spend the day together. I was so thrilled. What a hunk! I made some appointments with the cake lady and the photographer. Then we left! We went to Aaron's jewelry first to make sure Jason was absolutely sold on the ring we'd picked out.He was, of course, so we ordered it in the right size. It should be ready to go next week. Yay!! Check that off the list. Then we went up Ogden canyon and toured the Alaskan Inn. It was very nice. I'd never been there, but heard wonderful things from my sisters. It's cheaper than the Anniversary Inn that we'd originally picked for our first night together. Not as far... still nice... I'm good. :) We picked a cabin that we both liked. So that will be awesome for July. On the way home we stopped at Sams to get an eat to bite. (ha, ha-- Tom Hanks.) We looked at the ring I had picked out there. We still love it, but how to fit it in an already impossible budget? No clue. We'll find something soon, I hope. After that we had a short meeting with my parents. I got a budget put together last night, so we discussed that and all the wedding plans. It went very well. My parents are just a little concerned with Jason being unemployed. I mean, who isn't? But other than that, they are very supportive and helpful. My dad has commented to me several times that I would be happier married. And you know something, he's right. Then Jason and I went to Salt Lake to meet Brody Dezember, a photographer we liked. He was wonderful to talk to and his work looks lovely. A bit pricey, but certainly worth every cent. The pictures and rings are the only things that go beyond the wedding day. I'm not willing to skimp out on those precious memories. There are two other couples looking at the same date we are, so hopefully we can get him booked this weekend!! (Silly paycheck, come faster!!) It was fun to get everything in order. We meet with the cake lady on Friday, and then it's just coming up with the deposits. Money, money, money. But everything is going to be so lovely. I can't wait!! Jason, I love you!

Happy St. Patricks Day!!

So when I opened my closet this morning I realized I had no green clothes. None. Nothing at all. My mom let me borrow her green shamrock earrings and I wore my class ring. (Thank Heavens for Clearfield High!!) It was pretty sneaky, but I never got pinched! Whoo! Work went very well, today I passed the most difficult test before my next level, teller test 3. I also got called in for a little chat with my branch manager. Opps. Last night I forgot to lock up my cork lock. Big mistake! It didn't go too badly though, just a small chat of how we could fix the problem. My sweet Jason took me out for lunch to celebrate my test. It was so fun to relax for a minute and eat. Last night was a big event for us. Jason and I talked with his parents about getting married. They seemed generally supportive, which is more than we were expecting at this point. They've never really gotten to point of "okay" with our engagement. So, hopefully things will continue to go well there. Jason and I decided not to do the Lion House for the ceremony or luncheon once we talked it over. We decided on something more simple-- skip the luncheon and just have a nice, quiet ceremony then a reception right after. No need to add fluff. Jason and I are just happy to be getting married. We can't wait! We're going to take more recent pictures for sure and I'm going to make my own bouquet. Then just the invites. Not too bad, for trying to keep it inexpensive! It's starting to look like maybe Disneyland will be out of the picture, too... We're going to be lucky to just get into an apartment. But as I said, Jason and I couldn't care less. It's going to be so wonderful to just be together. :) Jason turned in a promising application today that we're hoping to hear back from in two or three days. A job would certainly be a blessing!! Keep us in your prayers!

Eternal Families

Families can be together forever. That seems to have just been the theme of this weekend. Yesterday was wonderful. Jason and I spent the whole day together just window shopping. We found a ring setting at Sams Club that I ended up completely falling in love with. It's so funny, because I've seen it before, but it's never caught my attention as something I'd like. Jason wanted me to pull it out and try it on anyway. When I put it together with a solitaire diamond and tried it on... oh, my heck. It was breathtaking!! And TOTALLY perfect for me! (Go figure.) After that we stopped at a little jewelery shop on the way home, just to see what was there. We've looked everywhere for a ring Jason liked, but could never find something that was more than "okay". This little shop had really awesome stuff for men and we found one that was perfect. *smile* I was completely thrilled. The prices even turned out right! So, look for our rings in July!! Then last night Jason and I went out to dinner to celebrate my mom's birthday. All of my sisters and their husbands were there (a major feat in itself, considering we just got James home from Iraq and Devin is going active duty next week). This was the first time I actually felt "included" and not just the odd number out. Couple dinners are no fun when the table seats 9 and you're the odd duckling. We went to Ye Old Lion's Den in Ogden, a new place for Jason and me. The dinner was fairly pricey, but wonderfully done. Several courses, plenty of time, fabulous service! Even when Dad started changing up the seating our waiter didn't get too lost with who's dish was who's. Most importantly, it was nice for mom. She loved it. Today was also nice. Jason and I got to tour the new Draper temple. It was so lovely and special. The sealing rooms made me cry, the Spirit there was simply overwhelming. Everything was so beautiful and clean. I loved being able to be inside and my whole being ached to be able to return with Jason next year. I never thought I could feel so strongly compelled to accomplish something. It was amazing. So, all in all, a perfect weekend. I couldn't have asked for more.

Date Night

What an interesting day! I went in early to work, so I could get off in time to go to Disney on Ice with Jason. It was pretty good day with the members. Jason had a fun day playing daycare for Bandit. I hate leaving him locked up in his kennel when I work so much. My sister gave me an idea to have Jason watch him a few days a week, so we thought we'd try it. It seemed to go well. They both had fun. After my lunch break at work, our system went down. It's such a pain to hand-write receipts and everything. Then when I was going to balance out for the day, I found I couldn't! With the system down, the computer didn't have the information to verify my totals. So, I waited. And waited. I called Jason to tell him I was going to be late, and waited some more. Finally I was able to get everything done and clock out an hour after I was planning. Jason and I ran out the door, hot pockets in hand for dinner. We barely made it in time for the show. It was a really fun performance with lots of effects and talent. They did four shows in one- Lion King, Little Mermaid, Lilo and Stitch, and Peter Pan. They even had the skaters fly! Tink had fireworks in her wand, too! It was amazing! Jason thought I was a little silly, cheering and waving like all the little kids, but I still loved it. What a fun date night with my honey!
Our meeting with the stake president went well. He was pleased to hear of our plans to get married July 8. We just need to figure out how to get there and best prepare to go to the temple next year to be sealed. Jason was excited to have the support. Every little bit helps and builds our confidence to accomplish the tasks before us.

Sick Days

Oh, I hate being sick. Yesterday was awful. I woke up feeling sick to my stomach, but decided to ignore it and get some breakfast. I could only eat a few bites before I realized it would hurt more than help. I got dressed and ready thinking maybe a shower would be best. I went to work, still not feeling great. When I got there I tested myself out on my first few members, but realized I wasn't getting any better. I asked my lead teller if there was any way I could go home, but she said they were already short handed for the day. So I went back to my window and tried to keep a smile on. I helped a few more members, then ended up getting sick right there in my window. I hit the trash can, thank heavens, but it was so embarrassing! I went to the break room and laid down for a full half hour. My tummy was still upset and my lead teller finally sent me home. I took a tub for two hours in some nice hot water. That helped, but I still spent the rest of the day in bed. When I woke up this morning I felt a bit better, but still not great. I called in sick- not wanting to repeat the mistake I made yesterday. It was a good thing I did, because I still feel yucky. I've mostly just relaxed. My puppy hasn't been nearly as restful as I have, though. He has taken this new time to learn how to jump on my bed. (Which is a pretty big leap for him, even Lady won't do it.) It's been fun to watch. He never fails to put a smile on my face. It's so sweet that he still just wants to be with his momma, even when she's sick. He's been such a blessing for me.
Jason and I have a meeting with the stake president tonight, to present our plan of getting married in July. I'm a bit nervous, but I still feel confident that this is right for the two of us. I'm sure the stake president will feel that as well. It would certainly be better to progress than continue digging deeper. I just hope things will fall into place for that to become reality, rather than just a wish. Perhaps tonight will help.

Four Months and Counting!

Jason and I are counting down! Only four months left, starting today. Our families have been very helpful since we've decided on this new date. Having the support is wonderful. We're still searching for the perfect place to call home. We just want something small so we can save up for a house with a backyard for Bandit. We have certainly decided on Disneyland for a honeymoon. I can't wait for that! Jason's never been to Medieval Times, so we want to try that and Knott's Berry Farm as well. It will be so fun to get away together! We'll just have to fine someone to watch our puppy for a few days... I've also decided to set some new goals to prepare myself to be a better wife. First of all I'm going to start taking better care of the things I need to do for myself. I need to set aside time everyday to walk, play piano, and do a service. I used to do those things regularly, but I've been slacking since I started working full time at America First. Jason has three nights a week that he raids on WOW though, so I should be able to fit them in somehow. I also want to start cross stitching again. I've always wanted to display one for my wedding that I did myself. So I'd better get working on that! Jason and I have a busy week. Thursday night is our date night and we're going to see Disney on Ice in SLC. I'm so excited! I've always wanted to go but never had the chance! Is that silly? I'm so glad I have a honey that understands I'm a bit childish sometimes. Friday night is the big couple dinner for my Mom's birthday. I hope that turns out. My sister and I got into a big scuffle over it today. Lame. Drama just comes from living in a family of all girls. (Poor Daddy...) Saturday we get to spend with Jason's family to walk through the new temple. That will be a wonderful experience. So, lots of plans coming up! Wish us luck! And pray for our tax return to come back!!

Boring Normal Life...

I wish I had something more exciting to write about, but I don't really. Jason is doing much better as is my sister Wendi.
Work has been good this week- nothing too exciting there. I had a quick review with my lead teller today. She said I was doing well and all my work looked good. I always have things to work on, though... I'm taking my security test next week. So wish me luck on that!!
Bandit is still just as happy as ever. A few days ago I took him to Jason's house and let him explore around there. He loved every second. Jason's dad even bought him treats! Wasn't that sweet of him? He's going to make such an awesome grandpa. Bandit is scared to death of him, though. He has such a booming voice, Bandit runs away every time. They're so cute to watch. Jason's mom has it all figured out, though. She just feeds Bandit off the table. He's loved her ever since. So, that was a fun experiment to try.
Jason and I are great. Just still looking for a job and a place to stay come July. Jason has decided to wait another year to get back to school, rather than this fall. He wants to make sure we're on our feet with the wedding and everything before adding another load to our little family. We're also starting to price honeymoons to Disneyland (because we're saving the "real" honeymoon to Disneyworld for our temple sealing). They're a lot more than I want them to be. But I'm sure we'll find something. I think we've decided to get married in the Lion House and have a small luncheon for family after the ceremony. Then we'll do a reception that night at the Clearfield City Building, or my stake center. I'm so excited. It's turning out so wonderful... I don't think I've ever seen Jason so confident and sure. He even had a talk with his parents about us and our plans. They're generally supportive, which I know means a lot to him. Hopefully things will continue to progress there.
I'm getting anxious for the warmer weather, I've missed the sunshine. I'm certainly ready for it to be spring!
This week my family is celebrating my mom's birthday with a couples dinner on Friday night. Jason and I are excited about that. I got to plan it, so I'm just hoping everything goes smoothly. With two of my sisters driving down from Logan, sometimes that's not as easy as it sounds.
So life goes on and here we are!